At some point of time, you might come across some Toxic people where you can’t win. Everything you say is twisted and turned back to be your fault. They are unable to admit any wrong doing.
Perhaps the worst kind of Toxic People are the educated, intelligent, and semi-self-reflective/self-aware types who still exhibit the typical negative tendencies of all other toxic people.
Toxic people can try to control the situation by framing it in the way they want to see it, through the way that they interact. This can be very compelling and irresistible.
One of the worst things you can do, when this happens is to defend yourself. But, It is usually a futile action and it only keeps an immature dialog going which eventually helps the toxic person get what they want. You won’t get anywhere with them by defending yourself and your actions. This makes being around such people very difficult. Everything you say turns into an interrogation. They become very controlling. If you say something, they would find fault with it and challenges you. Sometimes, you may feel tired and worn out being around them.
Learning to deal with such people is sometimes a lifelong process, but it’s necessary because toxic people are in every walk of life.. You do this by controlling your own actions and reactions. As you already know, you cannot control the actions of other people. But you can control yourself and your life.
* Move away from what hurts you and move towards what feels good. This is one of the best gifts you can ever give to yourself.
* Know that when a person is toxic it is because of their own issues. Sometimes these issues can be attributed to mental illness. Accept that a toxic persons behavior has nothing to do with you.
* In life, each of us has to take responsibility for our own actions. Toxic people do not do this. They have a habit of turning things around so that you feel bad, you feel guilty, and you feel like you are at fault. Remember that when dealing with a toxic person, they are responsible for their own actions, but often do not. Realize this and you take back your power.
* The best thing you can do when dealing with a toxic person is to walk away and not allow them to hurt you anymore. If you cannot walk away, then mentally walk away. You can do this by being kind to yourself.
* Allow yourself to disengage, disassociate, and detach. Detachment is a process of not caring. It is something you do for yourself. It is a mental skill that takes some time to learn at first, but once it is mastered, it can help you to become stronger mentally and physically.
* When dealing with toxic people remember that exercise is your best friend. Exercise relieves both mental and physical tensions. It helps the body to produce healing chemicals that will repair your body and help you think more clearly. Exercise also encourages the release of endorphins, chemicals that relieve pain and help you to feel good both mentally and physically.
* Most importantly develop supportive relationships with your life partner, friends, family, workmates, and associates. Talking things over with the people in your life who love and care for you, can help you to overcome the negativity of toxic people. Just as animals and children instinctively can sense when someone is good or evil, the people who love you are very good at recognizing when someone is toxic and hurting you. Loved ones are a good defense against toxic people because they can offer you good advice and support for eliminating negative influences in your life.